Monday, October 17, 2011

Really Sexy Lingerie

I know "sexy lingerie" and "pregnant lady" aren't terms that usually (ok, never) get used together, but that is because you haven't seen my new little number yet. Brace yourself, because this is intense. With about 2.5 yards of lace and spandex, I give you the Fancee Free Fancy Me Maternity Girdle:


In all seriousness, this thing is amazing. For the past two weeks, whenever I have to walk any sort of distance, I need my hands under my belly supporting the weight. I don't want to know what would happen if I didn't. I might pee myself, my back might give out, I might fall over, who knows. This thing may look hideous, but it does the job and I'm not ashamed to wear it.

The downside is that once you reach the point to where you need to wear one of these bad boys, you are also on the verge of peeing yourself every hour to two hours. So getting in and out of full-panel maternity pants, a girdle, and underwear some 12 times a day is quite the Olympic sport. But that's exercise, right? And for the low low price of $26 you can order one of your own from jay cee pee dot com.

Also, if you happen to see Scott, buy the guy a beer because this is what he has to come home to.

4 comments:

  1. Diane Bailey a.k.a. BusiaOctober 17, 2011 at 1:54 PM

    Kendall, I had to wear a maternity girdle after my appendectomy when I was 5 months pregnant with Jonathan to make sure my incision did not split open. I agree that the support is amazing and wore it until I delivered. This is one maternity garment that I wore when I was pregnant with Lauren and Kirsten. Your postpartum body will love you for the support.

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  2. I'm not knocking it! I think it's amazing. Too bad it looks so ugly, haha.

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  3. hilarious! but, i love and you know why? because i think my hubby may be coming home to one of these bad boys pretty soon! ~Jenny O'C

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  4. Haha I love it! Jim, prepare to have your mind blown!

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